Of tranquil emotions and Sigur Ros

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So, it's been a turbulent week/ month (so much for overhyped birthday months). Half of the month I have been seriously sick (still am, hence time for writing) which means not being able to work and missing out on some big opportunities.
I've been cutting my hands too often while cutting up apples, the last one so gory and deep that it made me quite lightheaded with the blood loss. So bored am I with life at this point that going to get that cut dressed seems like an avoidable task, and hence avoided.
My weight is acting like Brad Pitt from Benjamin Button and i'm again distinctly below 50. Pretty sad that's the only way i can compare anything with Brad Pitt (fml, right?).
A woman i fancied says she's elsewhere with the heart.

I could go on and on, but the bottomline here is that the birthday month has been pretty much forgetful and terrible, but hey, I found Matisyahu and Sigur Ros and any moment with good music is never a wasted moment.
In all this time that i had for myself, i've found that i've been spending too much time and effort trying to fit in again, same mistakes from years ago, and just realizing how self harming they can be. I'm not a pop boy, my music is totally different.
I'm not a beach bum, mountains are my calling.

Mould your life your way and you'll be amazed how it shapes up. Remember to feel things, remember what you believed in as a kid, and why you don't now, think on it.
And i, meanwhile, shall turn the proverbial (and literal) music up, and try to make sense of this mess that my life is, and maybe scare the fever away with real life drama.

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